This is a very long one so if you don't want to read the whole thing, the conclusion is at the end of the post!

This is my take on Females and Relationships (or lack thereof);

It seems that the further we venture into this millennium, more and more females began to see the error of their ways in handling things. One of the branches of life that exhibits the evidence of this so called 'evolution', is the co-dependency between the female form and the opposite sex. This is known as the phenomena of relationships..

I remember the days, back when divorces were still frowned upon, the aftermath of breakups were still predictable, and of course, the yesteryears when being cheated on by your boyfriend was not unheard of, but, as a lady, you were able to deal with it in a ladylike manner (to some extent, of course)..

Lets look at the memories one at time..

Penceraian
Although divorces are still taboo, it is no longer a surprise when they do happen.. There was a time when the ending of a marriage will cause tongues to wag for days on end..
The typical respond for 2008??

Cerai lagi???
So bosan already la this topic!!! NEXT!!!

Unless the divorcees are celebrities, or were involved in a scandal, or are celebrities who were involved in a scandal, the story would have very little to offer in order to command people's attention... And since we are on the topic, of course we will discuss bout 'mak jandas'... These women were once feared by wives for they are looked at as husband stealers.. Nowadays that is no longer the case.. Women everywhere are accepting the fact that the crumbling down of one's marriage does not mean that one has failed as a human being.. More and more people(both men and women) are incorporating the wisdom of these two phrases;
'Shyt happens' and so 'Life must and WILL go on'
And society in general has a more blaséd attitude towards these female individuals known as the jandas.. It has become such a common thing nowadays that you can just almost hear this type of response - "divorced yer?!?! welcome to the club!!!" - becoming a normality.

Breakups - 'how females deal'
Dulu after clash dengan boyfriend, most girls would think it is somehow their fault.. This train of thought results in either one or quite possibly all of the actions below;
-barricading themselves in their rooms
-avoiding contact with other human beings
-crying their eyes out (meraung or silent crying is up to the female in question)
-talking to the bestfriend, analysing each and every day of the relationship
-refusing meals
-binge eating (chocolate, ice cream, fried chicken etc etc)
Fact of the matter is, these actions are driven primarily by sadness and guilt... Hence, they are mostly self detrimental in the pursue of comfort..

The reactions that females nowadays have towards break ups are primarily driven by anger and hatred.. The 'what-have-i-done-wrong?' syndrome has been replaced by the 'that-effing-idiot-seriously-doesn't-know-what-he's-giving-up' belief... This gave birth to the new line of counter attacks employed by women who are in the now..
-every free minute is spent with friends
-go to events to get to know new people
-probably cry a few times in a bergenang air mata kind of way.. (unless mmg yu can cry at a drop of a hat.. then that's different!)
-talking to the bestfriend, bitching bout each and every flaw the dude has
-having meals at fancy places with friends just to treat themselves
-smoking/drinking and also binge eating while doing some more bitching about the 'ex'..
-listening to songs like 'i'm not missing you' and 'it's not right but it's ok'

Do bear in mind that this does not ring true for everyone.. It's just an observation i made on the few relationship carnages that surround me.. It may just be that that's how my circle handle things.. a still self detrimental but more proactive approach to get back on track.. No longer only depending on time to heal the 'wounds'... More often than not, they end with 'omaigod puas nye ati aku!!' and 'i don't need you anymore!!' kind of feeling..

Cheating Significant Others
All i can remember is that it involves a lot of nangis.. maki hamun sane sini (extreme cases) and more or less the same things you do when you break up... Now... the things done upon discovering that your loved one is not loving you alone, are numerous, various and might involve;
-punching
-screaming
-bawakking your friends to go serang his place
-kicking
-scratching (him AND his car)
-spending on his credit card till he is maxed out
-taking away his sim card (or his phone if you really wanna go all the way with this one)
-evicting him out of the house
-taking back all the stuff you ever gave him
-ratting him out to his parents
-telling everybody what he did so that he feels like a real jerk

and the list goes on to involve the person he is cheating with (if the girl knew that was going on..)

-pulling her hair
-confronting her one on one to tell her what a b!tch she is
-ratting her out to HER parents
-spreading the word bout what she did (exceptionally affective if you know tons of people)
-slapping her
-splashing water to her face (very popular if jumpe kat kedai makan)

and the list goes on and on.. Am not creative enough to come up with bizarre ways to get back at the people who hurt you.. All that i have listed down are the things that i know for a fact has happened amongst the people i am acquainted with..


Anyways, you might probably be thinking.. where am i going with all these trips down memory lane and comparing them to the present times.. Actually, what i want to point out is the reactions one might receive and perceive now, compared to how it was back then, has changed tremendously.. so listed below are the conclusions..

Women/Girls have learnt, throughout years of experiments, that;
1. Blaming themselves isn't what one should do when faced with hardships in a relationship..

2. Being actively angry and lashing out is an acceptable way to cope with break ups.. Girl power and all that shyt~

3. Breaking up is not the end of the world.. Keje, cari duit, be content with yourself and the guys will find you..

and the kicker...

4. This so called co-dependency is so over-rated..

And this, my friends, is why you find more and more females who are able to move from one relationship to another quite fast, able to leave their partners just-like-that, able to not care as much and be emotionally invulnerable, and last but not least, able to call themselves a commitaphobe. The End.


p/s: this not an attack on the male population, just mere justification for myself on why we behave the way we do..